I want to date her again , She wants to stay friends with benifits.
By - ApprehensiveFront957
Welcome to /r/dating_advice!
Please keep the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/about/rules/) of /r/dating_advice in mind while participating here. Try your best to be kind.
Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, [send us a message.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fdating_advice) We rely on user reports to find rule-breaking behavior quickly.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You should not continue running into a brick wall. She is telling you that you are running into a brick wall.
Your right! This is hard asf tbh but i will tryyy
Gonna start using this.
Stop seeing her. Start working on moving on.
Also: learn from this!
You stopped hanging out with and dropped your friends for someone you only ended up dating for a year and a half? Don't do that again! Also, try reaching out to and rekindling those friendships. It will take work, and you may need to be like "Hey, man, I'm sorry I've been so out of touch the last year; I know I kind of got consumed by that relationship, and I'm sorry I wasn't a better friend," but it's worth trying to get back those friendships. Most people understand and they'll be glad to see you again.
Understand that breaking up takes time, and you're allowed to be sad about it,but getting back together or doing some kind of friends with benefits thing when you haven't moved on is just trouble. Have either of you changed the things that led to the breakup in the first place? Do you want to? If not, you're just going to break up again.
Stop contacting her. Take space and time to get over the relationship. You don't need to think of it as "all in the trash." You had a relationship, and it had good parts and bad parts. Hopefully you've learned more about what you want out of a relationship, but you've also learned some things not to do (like, say, abandoning all your friends!). Force yourself to keep doing things that usually bring you joy. Make yourself stick to an exercise regime. Make yourself go out and do fun things with your friends to rekindle those friendships. Make yourself eat properly. When you start to feel down or start thinking about her, find ways to distract yourself so you're not dwelling on it.
Breakups are hard, man. They hurt. That's normal and okay. You'll get through this, but make sure you're taking steps to heal yourself. She can find a friend with benefits somewhere else; you two are over, so be over. Don't let yourself get sucked back in with that nonsense.
this was was great tbh. Motivated me by a good percentage. I will take note of this. God bless you bro.
My pleasure; you got this. Good luck, and definitely reach out to those friends; I've been on both sides of that part, and you'd be surprised how cool people are and how glad they'll be to hear from their bud.
Thank youu. I should.
Respect YOURSELF and move on. You deserve to be with someone who wants to be with you. Don't be used for sex. In the meantime, learn to enjoy your own company. I know it will be uncomfortable at first since you're used to being with someone and sharing time and experiences, but learn to enjoy doing all of those on your own. Then you can share with a partner again when you're ready.
Your 100% right bro. Thank youu!
Shes not using u to heal she's preventing you from healing and waiting to find the next best thing.
Edit: your also preventing yourself from healing
Edit 2: In reality she is already over you
I’ve been in her scenario multiple times before. I lose interest and break it off but keep the fwb thing going because of the sex. It’s terrible to do to them because I know they’re emotionally stuck on me but I was selfish and immature in those days.
Anyways what you need to do is find yourself. At any point in life you choose who you are going to be. It doesn’t matter if you’re 80 years old. You can still choose a goal and work at it. Block your ex on everything. Spend a lot of time to heal yourself and remember who you are. Heart break hurts but keeping in touch with her is just perpetuating the inevitable. Seriously focus on your own improvement and creating value in your life again. Find a purpose to chase after. Get back out there and socialize with friends. You can do this!
The next time you get into a relationship, don’t lose yourself for a girl. Don’t let the neediness take control of your actions. Be firm in your identity and confident in your values.
You’re a king and always gonna be a king!
Shake this one off and keep moving forward.
Wow❤️ much respect to you. Reading this from someone that was in her position and to share their opinion was very helpful. God bless you king/queen
You’re just hurting yourself. Stop seeing her and take some time to learn about yourself and what you enjoy.
She is probably doing a lot of healing.